Friday, January 09, 2009

A new year has come..

2008 was more than eventful! It was so full of wonderful, exciting and out-of-the-world moments... Just that it had so many things I wanted to write about but before I could write about one, the something better came.. so.. I give up trying to write anything about the year that was one of the most magical years in my life...

There was a new style of poetry I found myself experimenting.. so here are two samples from poems I managed to pen... Comments are most welcome!

I stand..

Fast lanes
Cross-roads
Everyone walking past
Everything changing
I stand- frozen
Sinking into a moment long gone
I stand- lost
Holding on to something that has moved on
I stand- waiting
To be back to the place where I think I belong
I stand- holding
Just the thought, that it wouldn’t be too long!


You and Me

The still moon
The restless clouds
The serene oak
Its dancing leaves
The clear pond
The scented breeze
The night becomes
You And Me!


And... I had the chance to see this really cute poem by someone.. If the poet gives me permission.. I shall reveal the name :D

Ode to Gmail

O simple, sincere, kindly soul
Who drew us close and made us whole,
O Google Mail, so prompt and dear,
How glad I am to have you near!

What joy I savour every time
My speaker rings with your sweet chime!
To my sore eyes how fair a sight
Her name is, next to your green light!

My trusted friend, my messenger,
The faithful bridge 'twixt me and her,
Are you a tunnel that takes love through,
Or is my first love really you?

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

Incomplete!!

Rules:
1. Put your MP3 player on shuffle
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. You must write the name of the song no matter what. No cheating!

IF SOMEONE SAYS “IS THIS OKAY?” YOU SAY?

"Against all odds"- Mariah Carey...

hmmm... Makes sense... most things are ok.. against all odds

WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY?

"Poongaatru un per solla"- Vetri Vizha

Wow... so romantic!! I'm starting to like this!

WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?

"Koncha neram"- Chandramukhi

Obvi.. I like my guy to be a total romantic too! Woaah!


HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?

"Akkam Pakkam"- Kireedom

I am surprised at how much sense this game can make... I really wanted some time off alone today!


WHAT IS YOUR LIFE’S PURPOSE?

"Sundari neeyum"- Micheal Madhana KamaRajan

Puhleezz... Gujaals aa irukaradhu mattume en vaaazhkaiyin kurikol illa!!! :D

WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?

"Love is all"- Air Supply

Now this is a totally freaky coincidence! My motto generally is "Love is all we need".. Amazing


WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?

"Yaaro Yaarukkul"- Chennai 28

I am totally freaking out! enna oru amazing coincidence again!


WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR PARENTS?


"Born to Try"- Delta Goodrem

Enna kodumai saar idhu?!!


WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?


"Raindrops keep falling on my head"- B.J Thomas

Errr.... I dont see any connection here!


WHAT IS 2+2?

"Unnai Kandene"-Parijatham

Now this makes sense ;) (fellow perverts... up to u to get it!)

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?

"Enthan Nenjil"- Kalaingan

Dhuja dearest... sandhoshama!


WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?

"Unnodu Vaazhatha"- Amarkalam

Ssssuppppppeeerrrr :D


WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?

he he he... this was pretty good!! infact COOL!

"All that Jazz"- Catherine Zeta Jones- Chicago

Couldnt have had a better song!


WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?


"Thoongaatha vizhigal"- Agni Natchatram

Mission Impossible!!! Totally!


WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?

"Something beautiful"- Robbie Williams

Bingo!! I seem to be getting a decent answer for most of the koschins!


WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?

"Nee oru Kaadhal Sangeetham"- Nayagan

Woah!! This happens to be the first duet my parents sang together soon after their wedding, in a medical conference... And I was their first anniversary gift! (I was born a week before their first wedding anniversary!)

WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?

"All the way"- Celine Dion and Frank Sinatra

I will.... I most certainly will... if the guy is ok with it... I'll atleast sing this song for him... Please let the next song be something absurd or people may think I'm cheating!


WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?

"Saroja saamaan nikalo"- Chennai 28

**blinks hard** not bad!


WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?

"Un per solla aasai"- Hariharan

If I find the love of my life.. I can consider this hobby as a full time profession.. but first... get me the name!!

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?

"Inji Idupazhaga"- Devarmagan

he he he.... **blush**

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?

"Brighter than Sunshine"- Aqualung

I seriously do... You guys rock!!

(please let the next song be something wierd and not make sense.. This is way too freaky!)


WHAT SHOULD YOU POST THIS AS?

This is ultimately hilarious in my opinion! Great parting shot!

"Incomplete"- Backstreet Boys

I had a great time doing this... Helped me have alot of fun... I was totally honest but the coincidences were too good.. maybe my playlist is mostly soul and country music and old melodies.. songs with lyrics that actually make sense and have a nice meaning... The next time I try this.. It'll be with a more assorted playlist.. And yeah... thanks Kesh for giving me the idea through your blog!

Herez the tagging part...

Dhuja, PA, Mighty Mani and Abi are tagged... have fun!

Friday, April 18, 2008

An arbit esoteric letter

Dear YOU……,

I haven’t written a letter in a very long time. I know I must conventionally start it with a “How are you?” as I intend to make this a conventional letter, but then again, I haven’t gone past that question in the past few months. Not that I don’t have anything more to ask. On the contrary, I’m so full of questions. Questions to which I’m ready to face the answers. Questions that can be answered only by you. But I’d rather let them go unvoiced. For I know you’d choose to ignore them, the way you ignore anything that concerns me.

I don’t have to explain why I did things the way I did them. I found them fit and I’m sure you don’t care. Saves a lot of meaningless words. Saves me the trouble of mailing you this letter and wishing you’d read it. You might ask me, if ever you read this, why I bothered to pen such an esoteric letter and blog it. Its simply because I wanted to. You’d never realize how happy it makes me to do just what I want to do, and not care how you’d feel about it. I’ve tried and tried real hard, to be accepted by you, to be someone you like, to be told that I’m liked and at one point of life, that was all that I ever wanted. At some point, hopes do die, wishes do crumble and people do change.

Trust me, this is not one of my usual hate mails, for I don’t hate you. Surprisingly, hate comes with understanding, just as love, and I feel I’ve never known you, let alone understand you enough to hate you. Indifference works. A lesson I learnt from you, the hard way. I don’t blame myself either. I was stuck with an illusion and that is very human.

Even if given another chance, I cannot be someone who is not me, to get back all that I’ve lost.

Sorry.

With no love lost,
………………. ME

Sunday, March 30, 2008

Melodrama

If you are backing off from reading this post after reading the title… Wait ho!! I don’t really blame you coz the last few posts of mine have been too melodramic (A critic rightly pointed out… I’ve could have been the script writer for a Lindsay Lohan movie!) The whole mess was because I was rather taking myself too seriously and thankfully I am too nauseated now looking at my own crappy posts that I decided the “wacky one” should be back…Then again don’t you think that the melodrama is out of my life… Its just I’ve started to use it in some odd places that have given me the kicks (figuratively and literally).

I came up with a new torture scheme to pain people big time… simply coz I am too bored! (*evil grin*) There are standard ‘don’ts’ to observe when talking with some people and they become stronger ‘don’ts’ if the person whom you converse with doesn’t believe in anything more than monosyllabic responses and become superlative ‘don’ts’ when he/she happens to totally feel uncomfortable with the very idea of conversing with you… So all we have to do is to do the don’ts! The starters include being clingy, almost on the verge of tears, taking offence at whatever the opponent says, using as many “LOLs and LMAOs” as possible in totally awkward places, asking inane questions, using the worst PJs you can come up with and finally dragging the non-existent conversation to a point where the opponent’s normal monosyllabic replies turn to good old silence(maybe slamming down of the phone if it’s a phone conversation). The trick is to raise your level of melodrama very slowly (learn it from the operas… start low and end big!) … You could go up to any level depending on your creativity…After the mentioned starters, you could pretend to be drunk, or maybe prophetize the armageddon, or start using some arbit tear-jerker serial’s dialogues but just make sure you appear totally melodramic and that the objective isn’t too obvious! Most of the opponents don’t survive for more than fifteen minutes…If they do… Move on to the next level in which you actually show no mercy… So start weeping out loud, mumbling things incoherently, sing a birthday song if you want to (just make sure you’re still crying while you are singing) or if you want to be totally wacky…do a remix of one of your old favorites the way these desi music directors do them and the rendition should be done while laughing or crying hysterically!
I did forget to mention that this scheme should be used only on
1) People who find indulging in good-natured friendly bantering much beneath them and express their disgust openly about the people who do indulge in them.
2) People whose lives are as spiced up as a loaf of whole wheat bread sans any accompaniments (trust me… you are doing them a favor)
3) People who have this delightful distaste for you (bah… there is no love lost anyways!)
Come to think of it… It is infact one of the most entertaining and harmless ways of getting back at a person who has pained you in the past… Just make sure that you have your sense of humor on the high and don’t do it if you’d feel bad incase they ignore you… So next time you feel very angry or depressed, try this out… it helps!

By the way, I just came across this piece of information. It is proved mathematically that we have 90% probability of breathing atleast one molecule of air that Julius Cesar breathed nearly 2 milleniums ago! (now I know whom to blame for this wretched cold I’ve caught!)

Saturday, March 08, 2008

Wisdom....gained!

Feels good to have the time to write something, and I don’t know when I would get the time to do this next. I am really wondering how I became so busy all of a sudden. Infact its been weeks since I had a long leisurely chat with my close buddies. This is not the only reason why I stopped writing. I lacked a muse! Whatever I wrote were just a group of words that were forced from a pen! Time has helped me find a new muse… not as strong as the one I lost, nevertheless a muse! And here are some random thoughts…

When I really felt that the poetess and the kid in me were dead, I met this absolute stranger who gave me hope of rejuvenating them! So here I am attempting at poetry to dedicate to the kid I saw in a bus…

Your smile- its brilliance
Made me forget that we were strangers
Your eyes holding the invite
To look into them and see
That child inside me…
We played a game
Hide and seek
Someday you’d learn that life
Was just a tougher version
Of that same game…
But that moment
I didn’t care about reality
About those funny stares
Those un-raised questions
About the next moment…
For all I wanted to live then
Was the game we played!

Talking about kids, I discovered yet again that wisdom often comes from the mouth of a kid! I am not sure if the person who spoke these lines thought of them himself, or read them somewhere, but I am sure he’d not like being alluded to as a kid! I’m sorry for that… I somehow don’t feel he is a grown up… When talking about someone he said, “Do you know why he is single? That’s because he gives something of himself to everyone but not everything to someone!”…The irony is that a friend of mine asked me the question “Why am I single?” to fill up some contest paper… But it really started a train of thoughts that lead me far from the “George-Clooney-has-not said-yes-yet!” answer I gave her…and Lo! This kid comes up with a fantastic answer(though he was talking about someone else)… It couldn’t be more fitting… I do give something of myself to everyone but I’ve never felt like even being completely me with anyone… That answered another very important question in that had been in my mind for a really long time… Why I never felt very close with anyone… That is because I’ve never given everything to someone! Maybe I’m scared to be completely myself and be hated for that… Maybe I want to make sure that the person is capable of handling it… Maybe I want to test if the person is worthy of getting to know me completely… People here who want to argue that you can never get to know a person completely, I must say you are right because even we don’t know ourselves completely… What I am talking about here is the comfort to express my every thought, not having to fear that I would be judged or hated…The freedom to probe into their lives and the trust to let them probe into mine as much as they want to… I realized that I’m insecure when it comes to any relationship, and the more meaningful it gets, the more insecure I get! So as a defense mechanism, unconsciously I make sure mutual hatred develops when I start liking a person a lot! I’ve hurt some really nice people because of this…and I’m glad some of them decided to still put up with me! Kudos to you all!

And as another friend of mine said, after a very beautiful miracle that made him believe in miracles, “Life is a complicated plot… We’re seeing small portions of it everyday… But even then, sometimes we can’t believe how beautiful it is… I can wait for an eternity to see the whole story!”

Friday, January 25, 2008

Moving on...

Life is all about moving on. A lesson that every passing second seems to whisper in our ears. A truth we forget during those bittersweet moments where we thought time stood still, those moments when life seemed to freeze and we wished it would stay so for eternity. And when these moments pass, we wake up to reality with a feeling of having been woken up with a douse of very cold water. It hurts… but it proves again that life is all about moving on…

Love, just makes the whole thing more painful. Aren’t there times we cursed ourselves for having loved something too much? And aren’t these the times when we try to let them go? The times when we have to move on? Time and time alone heals these wounds…coz like it or not, we keep moving on.

I let go of that which made my yesterday beautiful, that which left my heart bleeding today and that which I may never think of tomorrow. I burn with it, all those memories, of tears and smiles, of mirth and melancholy, of the most subtle things to the deepest promises…everything that was.. and that will never be…

I let go.. with a tear at the corner of my eye, and a faint smile tugging my lips….. I am moving on….

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Dusting!

I see my window has been closed for quite some time.. Not that I'd been very busy or anything.. Just that I was a little too lazy to sit and pen my thoughts.. Not that I'm gonna write anything useful either. Just some random musings before I close my window again with a "Not to be opened till Christmas" sign.. Thank GRE for that!

Though I'm supposed have been revising for my semester exams(bah!) from morn, I managed to watch this really cute movie "Aquamarine".. The theme was deceivingly childish.. A mermaid, with the help of two teens, tries to find true love in 3 days!! I thought it was one more of those ridiculous nevertheless entertainly teen flicks.. I admit I was wrong... The movie seemed so in touch with reality, and was so not the usual hollywood masala (yeah.. the guy the mermaid seeks to find true love with doesnt fall in love with her as we all expect, and the movie ends unexpectedly in a beautiful way!) One of the most beautiful dialogues in the film.. or rather one of the best I've ever heard is this.. (the teen tells the mermaid) "You know why we humans go so crazy about love?.. because its the closest thing we have to magic!" Beaut or what?!

I've been exposed to alot of contrasts of late... At one extreme, I was suffocating with the milk of human kindness that seemed to flow so subtly yet so strong from a few people and at the other end, I was shocked by the stark indifference people can extend to those who love them.. May be becoz of this 'weathering' effect or simply becoz I'm bored of being the "nice" kid, I noticed that I've become a little sarcastic (understatement!) and bitchy these days with a noticable reduction in my tolerance level.. Ofcourse I'm not that way with everyone but just with a few unfortunate souls who rub me the wrong way.. And as a result of that... here I am (trying hard to avoid the choicest swear) wishing that a particular pal (?!!) of mine could rot in Hell for being the insolent and irritating jerk he was, having made me waste time in the past and even recently trying to help him! (you know who you are!) Just wanted to declare that I'm totally annoyed and that I regret for ever having known such a nice chap!


Being one of the few remaining singles in my friends circle burdens me with this awful responsibility of throwing some gems of knowledge to the irresponsible committed junta(copmrises aboout 98% of them)..
1) Its not so "uncool" to be single, so please don't go tut tuting and pitying the singles around you, thereby making a bigger fool of yourself
2) We all know that the world revolves only around you two.. Then why the hell do you pull some innocent people into it and cause a big commotion.. Stick to your fantasies and we'll stick on to our lives.
3)If you really feel the rest of us are missing out something great, try not to flaunt your affection by displaying it in public, or ooze in your mobiles.. By doing these you just let us know, we are just missing out on being totally irritating!
God bless you all! Bless us more for having to put up with u!
4) We care about the problems of some near and dear ones, whose tales of woe we listen to with genuine worry and try solving their relationship problems.. This doesnt mean that we singles are just there to be universal agony aunts/uncles.. We will lend our ears and shoulders to those who matter.. and not to everyone!


Good or bad.. changes are inevitable and I'm surfing in the waves of life.. with nothing but uncertainity! Pray for my GRE score to be decent people.. not that it'd guarantee certainity but atleast it wouldn't worsen my uncertainity!