Melodrama

If you are backing off from reading this post after reading the title… Wait ho!! I don’t really blame you coz the last few posts of mine have been too melodramic (A critic rightly pointed out… I’ve could have been the script writer for a Lindsay Lohan movie!) The whole mess was because I was rather taking myself too seriously and thankfully I am too nauseated now looking at my own crappy posts that I decided the “wacky one” should be back…Then again don’t you think that the melodrama is out of my life… Its just I’ve started to use it in some odd places that have given me the kicks (figuratively and literally).

I came up with a new torture scheme to pain people big time… simply coz I am too bored! (*evil grin*) There are standard ‘don’ts’ to observe when talking with some people and they become stronger ‘don’ts’ if the person whom you converse with doesn’t believe in anything more than monosyllabic responses and become superlative ‘don’ts’ when he/she happens to totally feel uncomfortable with the very idea of conversing with you… So all we have to do is to do the don’ts! The starters include being clingy, almost on the verge of tears, taking offence at whatever the opponent says, using as many “LOLs and LMAOs” as possible in totally awkward places, asking inane questions, using the worst PJs you can come up with and finally dragging the non-existent conversation to a point where the opponent’s normal monosyllabic replies turn to good old silence(maybe slamming down of the phone if it’s a phone conversation). The trick is to raise your level of melodrama very slowly (learn it from the operas… start low and end big!) … You could go up to any level depending on your creativity…After the mentioned starters, you could pretend to be drunk, or maybe prophetize the armageddon, or start using some arbit tear-jerker serial’s dialogues but just make sure you appear totally melodramic and that the objective isn’t too obvious! Most of the opponents don’t survive for more than fifteen minutes…If they do… Move on to the next level in which you actually show no mercy… So start weeping out loud, mumbling things incoherently, sing a birthday song if you want to (just make sure you’re still crying while you are singing) or if you want to be totally wacky…do a remix of one of your old favorites the way these desi music directors do them and the rendition should be done while laughing or crying hysterically!
I did forget to mention that this scheme should be used only on
1) People who find indulging in good-natured friendly bantering much beneath them and express their disgust openly about the people who do indulge in them.
2) People whose lives are as spiced up as a loaf of whole wheat bread sans any accompaniments (trust me… you are doing them a favor)
3) People who have this delightful distaste for you (bah… there is no love lost anyways!)
Come to think of it… It is infact one of the most entertaining and harmless ways of getting back at a person who has pained you in the past… Just make sure that you have your sense of humor on the high and don’t do it if you’d feel bad incase they ignore you… So next time you feel very angry or depressed, try this out… it helps!

By the way, I just came across this piece of information. It is proved mathematically that we have 90% probability of breathing atleast one molecule of air that Julius Cesar breathed nearly 2 milleniums ago! (now I know whom to blame for this wretched cold I’ve caught!)

Wisdom....gained!

Feels good to have the time to write something, and I don’t know when I would get the time to do this next. I am really wondering how I became so busy all of a sudden. Infact its been weeks since I had a long leisurely chat with my close buddies. This is not the only reason why I stopped writing. I lacked a muse! Whatever I wrote were just a group of words that were forced from a pen! Time has helped me find a new muse… not as strong as the one I lost, nevertheless a muse! And here are some random thoughts…

When I really felt that the poetess and the kid in me were dead, I met this absolute stranger who gave me hope of rejuvenating them! So here I am attempting at poetry to dedicate to the kid I saw in a bus…

Your smile- its brilliance
Made me forget that we were strangers
Your eyes holding the invite
To look into them and see
That child inside me…
We played a game
Hide and seek
Someday you’d learn that life
Was just a tougher version
Of that same game…
But that moment
I didn’t care about reality
About those funny stares
Those un-raised questions
About the next moment…
For all I wanted to live then
Was the game we played!

Talking about kids, I discovered yet again that wisdom often comes from the mouth of a kid! I am not sure if the person who spoke these lines thought of them himself, or read them somewhere, but I am sure he’d not like being alluded to as a kid! I’m sorry for that… I somehow don’t feel he is a grown up… When talking about someone he said, “Do you know why he is single? That’s because he gives something of himself to everyone but not everything to someone!”…The irony is that a friend of mine asked me the question “Why am I single?” to fill up some contest paper… But it really started a train of thoughts that lead me far from the “George-Clooney-has-not said-yes-yet!” answer I gave her…and Lo! This kid comes up with a fantastic answer(though he was talking about someone else)… It couldn’t be more fitting… I do give something of myself to everyone but I’ve never felt like even being completely me with anyone… That answered another very important question in that had been in my mind for a really long time… Why I never felt very close with anyone… That is because I’ve never given everything to someone! Maybe I’m scared to be completely myself and be hated for that… Maybe I want to make sure that the person is capable of handling it… Maybe I want to test if the person is worthy of getting to know me completely… People here who want to argue that you can never get to know a person completely, I must say you are right because even we don’t know ourselves completely… What I am talking about here is the comfort to express my every thought, not having to fear that I would be judged or hated…The freedom to probe into their lives and the trust to let them probe into mine as much as they want to… I realized that I’m insecure when it comes to any relationship, and the more meaningful it gets, the more insecure I get! So as a defense mechanism, unconsciously I make sure mutual hatred develops when I start liking a person a lot! I’ve hurt some really nice people because of this…and I’m glad some of them decided to still put up with me! Kudos to you all!

And as another friend of mine said, after a very beautiful miracle that made him believe in miracles, “Life is a complicated plot… We’re seeing small portions of it everyday… But even then, sometimes we can’t believe how beautiful it is… I can wait for an eternity to see the whole story!”