I see my window has been closed for quite some time.. Not that I'd been very busy or anything.. Just that I was a little too lazy to sit and pen my thoughts.. Not that I'm gonna write anything useful either. Just some random musings before I close my window again with a "Not to be opened till Christmas" sign.. Thank GRE for that!
Though I'm supposed have been revising for my semester exams(bah!) from morn, I managed to watch this really cute movie "Aquamarine".. The theme was deceivingly childish.. A mermaid, with the help of two teens, tries to find true love in 3 days!! I thought it was one more of those ridiculous nevertheless entertainly teen flicks.. I admit I was wrong... The movie seemed so in touch with reality, and was so not the usual hollywood masala (yeah.. the guy the mermaid seeks to find true love with doesnt fall in love with her as we all expect, and the movie ends unexpectedly in a beautiful way!) One of the most beautiful dialogues in the film.. or rather one of the best I've ever heard is this.. (the teen tells the mermaid) "You know why we humans go so crazy about love?.. because its the closest thing we have to magic!" Beaut or what?!
I've been exposed to alot of contrasts of late... At one extreme, I was suffocating with the milk of human kindness that seemed to flow so subtly yet so strong from a few people and at the other end, I was shocked by the stark indifference people can extend to those who love them.. May be becoz of this 'weathering' effect or simply becoz I'm bored of being the "nice" kid, I noticed that I've become a little sarcastic (understatement!) and bitchy these days with a noticable reduction in my tolerance level.. Ofcourse I'm not that way with everyone but just with a few unfortunate souls who rub me the wrong way.. And as a result of that... here I am (trying hard to avoid the choicest swear) wishing that a particular pal (?!!) of mine could rot in Hell for being the insolent and irritating jerk he was, having made me waste time in the past and even recently trying to help him! (you know who you are!) Just wanted to declare that I'm totally annoyed and that I regret for ever having known such a nice chap!
Being one of the few remaining singles in my friends circle burdens me with this awful responsibility of throwing some gems of knowledge to the irresponsible committed junta(copmrises aboout 98% of them)..
1) Its not so "uncool" to be single, so please don't go tut tuting and pitying the singles around you, thereby making a bigger fool of yourself
2) We all know that the world revolves only around you two.. Then why the hell do you pull some innocent people into it and cause a big commotion.. Stick to your fantasies and we'll stick on to our lives.
3)If you really feel the rest of us are missing out something great, try not to flaunt your affection by displaying it in public, or ooze in your mobiles.. By doing these you just let us know, we are just missing out on being totally irritating!
God bless you all! Bless us more for having to put up with u!
4) We care about the problems of some near and dear ones, whose tales of woe we listen to with genuine worry and try solving their relationship problems.. This doesnt mean that we singles are just there to be universal agony aunts/uncles.. We will lend our ears and shoulders to those who matter.. and not to everyone!
Good or bad.. changes are inevitable and I'm surfing in the waves of life.. with nothing but uncertainity! Pray for my GRE score to be decent people.. not that it'd guarantee certainity but atleast it wouldn't worsen my uncertainity!
Wednesday, November 14, 2007
Sunday, September 23, 2007
Yesterday.....
I went to sleep last night
With a dream of tomorrow
This morning... I woke up in the same bed
In the same room.. but wait
Everything else had changed
I looked a little older..
Could I have grown up so much in a day?
The dream I slept with yesterday
Was the nightmare I had woken up to
I panic!
I call the number that I've called so often
Familiar voice, unfamiliar person
She had also changed...
I rush out to meet the world...
The world I thought I belonged to...
Only to find that I am a stranger...
The crush I had a day before
Was nowhere in my mind today
The friend I'd shared days with
Was just another person of yesterday..
I scream in silence.. so no one notices
But even if they did.. Would they care?
I dare not ask questions...
The answers may be too much for me to take..
I sleep...
Wishing to wake up to.... yesterday!
With a dream of tomorrow
This morning... I woke up in the same bed
In the same room.. but wait
Everything else had changed
I looked a little older..
Could I have grown up so much in a day?
The dream I slept with yesterday
Was the nightmare I had woken up to
I panic!
I call the number that I've called so often
Familiar voice, unfamiliar person
She had also changed...
I rush out to meet the world...
The world I thought I belonged to...
Only to find that I am a stranger...
The crush I had a day before
Was nowhere in my mind today
The friend I'd shared days with
Was just another person of yesterday..
I scream in silence.. so no one notices
But even if they did.. Would they care?
I dare not ask questions...
The answers may be too much for me to take..
I sleep...
Wishing to wake up to.... yesterday!
Saturday, July 21, 2007
Weird me!
I don’t know how I can restrict to 8 weird things about me when everything about me is weird… But having been tagged by Harini… here goes…
8) Time and again I fall in love with some fictitious character.. The list is really long but Ivan (Ukrainian tales), Fredrick aka Fatty (Five Find-Outers), Julian (Famous Five), Darcy (Pride and Prejudice), Sherlock Holmes are some of the characters I have a huge crush on!
7) I always learn a twisted process faster. Like back-hand in tennis or shuttle and back- stroke in swimming. Both my tennis and swimming coaches have told my parents that this was very weird!
6) I have very unpredictable and extreme mood swings.. One instant I’d be sobbing my heart out and the next I’d be laughing like nothing happened! And yeah.. I cry when I’m angry!
5) Whenever I’m nervous, my mind never registers what I’m doing.. I would spend an hour or two talking to some person who gives me the jitters and still not remember a word of the conversation at the end of it!
4) I start singing suddenly, a little loud at times, which kinda freaks out people, especially during the lab or classes..
3) I slap myself on the cheek whenever I do some major mistake!
2) I talk a lot to myself.. and sometimes I get so engrossed in the conversation that the rest of the world is totally blocked out! I’m my own imaginary friend!
1) I love to play really stupid pranks on people… This is something I cant elaborate on.. sorry!
8) Time and again I fall in love with some fictitious character.. The list is really long but Ivan (Ukrainian tales), Fredrick aka Fatty (Five Find-Outers), Julian (Famous Five), Darcy (Pride and Prejudice), Sherlock Holmes are some of the characters I have a huge crush on!
7) I always learn a twisted process faster. Like back-hand in tennis or shuttle and back- stroke in swimming. Both my tennis and swimming coaches have told my parents that this was very weird!
6) I have very unpredictable and extreme mood swings.. One instant I’d be sobbing my heart out and the next I’d be laughing like nothing happened! And yeah.. I cry when I’m angry!
5) Whenever I’m nervous, my mind never registers what I’m doing.. I would spend an hour or two talking to some person who gives me the jitters and still not remember a word of the conversation at the end of it!
4) I start singing suddenly, a little loud at times, which kinda freaks out people, especially during the lab or classes..
3) I slap myself on the cheek whenever I do some major mistake!
2) I talk a lot to myself.. and sometimes I get so engrossed in the conversation that the rest of the world is totally blocked out! I’m my own imaginary friend!
1) I love to play really stupid pranks on people… This is something I cant elaborate on.. sorry!
Tuesday, June 26, 2007
Vacation musings!
Having gone Trans-Atlantic alone and with just a week to lose my teen status... here are some random musings!
When you are sitting in a flight wide awake with some 10 hours to reach your destination, with not-so-interesting in-flight music and movies, mild nausea, an impending threat of missing your connecting flight, a snoring and boring person next to you and absolutely nothing to do... you know how lonely you can feel..
After this, when you step out of the flight and rush out to be greeted by your family... you know what relief is...
When you get hugged by your sibling whom you've missed fighting and conspiring with for the past 2 weeks (who'd never hug you under normal circumstances!) you'll know how it feels to smile and cry at the same time!
When you step into Disney World... you'll see yourself transforming into a kid... involuntarily maybe but certainly!
When you fall asleep in a van with your favorite music playing, after a great day in a park and three siblings already sleeping in your lap and shoulder... you'll get to experience the warmth of true content!
When you see the mechanical life of people in the US, you do thank your Gods for giving you the time to enjoy the small pleasures in life..
When you are in the Maid of the Mist boat in Niagara, in the middle of the Horseshoe Falls... You experience one of the amazing wonders of Nature to the fullest!
When you look out of the window in your plane and enjoy the eagle's view of the city/town... you do tend to feel that you are at the top of the world (figuratively and literally!)
Whenever a souvenir catches your eye, the person whom you want to give it to also flashes in your mind!
When you see how different and indifferent a kid you loved has grown, you feel cold even at 90 degrees Fahrenheit!
When you go in a convertible at night in Manhattan downtown.. you get a picture of what the future world might be!
When you travel in the upper open deck of the tourist bus, you get the 4-D experience of NY in you
To beat this, all you have to do is take a subway train!
You get sick of pizzas and fries after a week of eating nothing but them!
When you land in Chennai after just 3 weeks of being out of the country, you'll find that dirt and garbage strewn here and there will irritate you..
When you get back to your house, you'll get this sense-of-belonging... Yeah! I realized there is no place I'd feel this comfortable!
When you are sitting in a flight wide awake with some 10 hours to reach your destination, with not-so-interesting in-flight music and movies, mild nausea, an impending threat of missing your connecting flight, a snoring and boring person next to you and absolutely nothing to do... you know how lonely you can feel..
After this, when you step out of the flight and rush out to be greeted by your family... you know what relief is...
When you get hugged by your sibling whom you've missed fighting and conspiring with for the past 2 weeks (who'd never hug you under normal circumstances!) you'll know how it feels to smile and cry at the same time!
When you step into Disney World... you'll see yourself transforming into a kid... involuntarily maybe but certainly!
When you fall asleep in a van with your favorite music playing, after a great day in a park and three siblings already sleeping in your lap and shoulder... you'll get to experience the warmth of true content!
When you see the mechanical life of people in the US, you do thank your Gods for giving you the time to enjoy the small pleasures in life..
When you are in the Maid of the Mist boat in Niagara, in the middle of the Horseshoe Falls... You experience one of the amazing wonders of Nature to the fullest!
When you look out of the window in your plane and enjoy the eagle's view of the city/town... you do tend to feel that you are at the top of the world (figuratively and literally!)
Whenever a souvenir catches your eye, the person whom you want to give it to also flashes in your mind!
When you see how different and indifferent a kid you loved has grown, you feel cold even at 90 degrees Fahrenheit!
When you go in a convertible at night in Manhattan downtown.. you get a picture of what the future world might be!
When you travel in the upper open deck of the tourist bus, you get the 4-D experience of NY in you
To beat this, all you have to do is take a subway train!
You get sick of pizzas and fries after a week of eating nothing but them!
When you land in Chennai after just 3 weeks of being out of the country, you'll find that dirt and garbage strewn here and there will irritate you..
When you get back to your house, you'll get this sense-of-belonging... Yeah! I realized there is no place I'd feel this comfortable!
Saturday, May 19, 2007
Face my music
Just wanted to try this out... My mic was bad and I didnt have a karoake player(I'd rather not talk about how my voice is!)... Do hear it and post ur comments..Click on the qidget and wait for some time for the disaster to play!
| yamunai.wav |
Monday, May 14, 2007
The "Missing" mania
The reason why I'm writing this post at some 10:30 in the night when I would generally be crashing is that.. I just want to get this off my mind... I hate missing anything..people, things..anything!! For some people 'missing' is this slightly melancholy feeling that occasionally troubles them.. For some others 'missing' is the craving for something, craving filled with pain, so much pain that you really can't share unless you have someone who'd patiently hear you weeping and not ask a thing... I am one among the latter... Right now I feel so down.... I miss my parents and sister.. Miss being with them in US.. Both combined together is this devastating feeling of being lonely.. Maternal and Paternal grandparents have been extra nice to me.. taking care of my every whim and fancy when all I could do is put up a pretense of being ok.. I hate myself every time I lose my temper with these sweet old people who despite their age, do so much to keep me comfortable... I miss the old me, the brighter more pleasant and sweeter me, who'd never dream of letting the steam out infront of my grandparents!! Last summer, under similar circumstances, I never felt this uneasy.. Maybe coz I had someone to keep me on my toes... I miss that person.. To people who know me, they know who I'm talking about.. For the rest of you.. It’s not really necessary to know.. This someone had spent so much of money and time to make sure I felt good.. Lent me shoulders to weep on.. Scolded me as much as mom would for wasting time before exams.. and cared for me the way a sibling would.. and those 10 cold days.. this person's care was my blanket.. But now I am not in touch with this person.. We've almost become strangers... I don’t blame the person coz I know its just the circumstances.. I miss this person badly now! I miss some bad old days, when I was content cribbing and crying alone in the dark if I felt bad.. Now I seek the attention and care of another person.. When I don't get it.. I feel miserable!! Picking up my phone and searching the three hundred odd contacts, I can put down the names of 5 people to whom I could call and cry, and who would ofcourse listen to me patiently.. But the point is.. Am I not being selfish?? I've done this so many times to them.. They don’t deserve to be agonized by my misery.. So I stop myself from spoiling their moods... That no way clears mine! I don’t know why missing one thing leads to missing so many things.. I've turned crazy.. I've started missing everything I'd almost forgotten.. My old friends, the old house of my grandparents, my old toys..and what not!! And this culminates into an ocean of depression that seems to drag me in.. Only some good sleep and the impending threat of my 5 remaining exams get me out of this for a while!
If anyone is reading this.. your thoughts right now would be.. "Why is she over-reacting?"- I'm sorry.. I just couldn't help it! and this will lead to the question- "Why blog all this crap?"- I know its wrong to throw open my silly emotions in public, but hey, I just felt like standing atop a hill and shouting this out.. I guess my blog would be almost equal to that.. The action helps relieve you, while you dont really care who heard you and who didn't.. at the same time, if some kind passerby does hear you out.. you'd certainly want to say this to them "God bless you!"
If anyone is reading this.. your thoughts right now would be.. "Why is she over-reacting?"- I'm sorry.. I just couldn't help it! and this will lead to the question- "Why blog all this crap?"- I know its wrong to throw open my silly emotions in public, but hey, I just felt like standing atop a hill and shouting this out.. I guess my blog would be almost equal to that.. The action helps relieve you, while you dont really care who heard you and who didn't.. at the same time, if some kind passerby does hear you out.. you'd certainly want to say this to them "God bless you!"
Wednesday, May 09, 2007
Unspoken words!
I've never spoken in some "interesting" conversations in my life the way I wanted to... Just putting up a few..
These are common conversations.. I get to go through these thrice a year atleast ever since I joined college!
Mr/Mrs X: Do you know 'so-n-so' from your coll?
Me : Which year and dept.. uncle/aunty??(Maybe I do, maybe I don't.. and I really don't give a shit)
Mr/Mrs X: Hmmm... IT..no CSE..Not very sure.. Maybe EEE... I think he/she must be in the second..no.. third...maybe fourth year!
Me : Oh! not really sure uncle/aunty.. will try to find out *polite smile* (Hey.. you could have mentioned all the eleven depts in my coll, why even some 20-30 colls in the country.. if you've no clue what that loser does or where he/she is.. then better not talk about him/her)
A relative: So which course have you taken?
Me : Instrumentation ( I know now why you haven't found anyone else to talk to.. Ask the same question everytime you meet a person.. you'll be termed "plague"!)The relative: So how is the scope for your course?
Me : Its pretty good uncle/aunty..(And what if its not? are you gonna get me a job?)
The relative: You should read very hard and save your family's name.. This is the least you could do to compensate for not being a doctor!
Me: :Sure.. I will try my best!(Yeah.. thanks for such a worthless piece of advice...Throw more of these on the ground and they'd become natural manure!)
Another relative: Ah! you are next in line!
(in a wedding)
Me : I'm just 19 uncle/aunty...I've my UG to finish and PG to work on.. Might take another 5-6 years easily! (Next in line?? To what?? Jumping off the cliff? No way)
The relative : That'll make you 25! half a grandma!
Me (clearly uneasy): I guess right now I dont really have any fixed plans.. Just want to finish my studies...Haven't given a thought about all this (Half-a-grandma?? WTF do you think you are you old fart?)
The relative : Good! Get married soon after UG and then go to US with your husband.. See my daughter.. She is now a happy green-card holder!
Me(very uneasy now): *smile*(Get this straight you ass.. I'm still a kid.. I know what I want and when I want it.. Green-card is not my idea of a great life.. I still don't see how you got married anyways! Must have been the greatest tragedy in your husband's/wife's life!)
Some guys can be real jerks...
Jerk: Do you know "some-arbit-girl"?
Me : I guess I know her...
Jerk: What is her character like?
Me: I don't really know her that well (and even if I did.. I dont have to tell you.. So what if she is a dirty,slimy,bitchy low-life?? You are worse!)
Jerk2: You are Y's friend right?
Me : Yeah!
Jerk2: We need to talk
Me : Ok (?????????)
Jerk2: You might think I'm mad... But I'm deeply in love with Y.. I want you to understand that!
Me : Huh?? (I know for sure that you are mad now! Why are you telling me your sob story? I dont even know you!)
Jerk2: You must talk to her about this and make her understand!
Me : *silent* (I will definitely talk to her.. tell her that you are the last person she should be seen with)Jerk2: Please sister.. Help me
Me :*silent*(If I had a brother like you.. I'd have shot him dead myself.. Buzz off!)
Other common orkut questions like "Can we have friendship?".."Shall we friends?" really draw the choicest swear out of my keyboard.. At times I think a basic English course should be undertaken by these jerks!
And this conversation took place recently... I really wish I answered the way I should have!
My parents' friend(hoping to embarass me): My daughter says you know most of the guys in college.. Is that true??
Me(smiling) : She must have been joking! (You must ask you daughter how well she knows this chap 'X'... I guess they know each other pretty well coz I see them hanging around in the canteen and the road side benches very often!!)
These are common conversations.. I get to go through these thrice a year atleast ever since I joined college!
Mr/Mrs X: Do you know 'so-n-so' from your coll?
Me : Which year and dept.. uncle/aunty??(Maybe I do, maybe I don't.. and I really don't give a shit)
Mr/Mrs X: Hmmm... IT..no CSE..Not very sure.. Maybe EEE... I think he/she must be in the second..no.. third...maybe fourth year!
Me : Oh! not really sure uncle/aunty.. will try to find out *polite smile* (Hey.. you could have mentioned all the eleven depts in my coll, why even some 20-30 colls in the country.. if you've no clue what that loser does or where he/she is.. then better not talk about him/her)
A relative: So which course have you taken?
Me : Instrumentation ( I know now why you haven't found anyone else to talk to.. Ask the same question everytime you meet a person.. you'll be termed "plague"!)The relative: So how is the scope for your course?
Me : Its pretty good uncle/aunty..(And what if its not? are you gonna get me a job?)
The relative: You should read very hard and save your family's name.. This is the least you could do to compensate for not being a doctor!
Me: :Sure.. I will try my best!(Yeah.. thanks for such a worthless piece of advice...Throw more of these on the ground and they'd become natural manure!)
Another relative: Ah! you are next in line!
(in a wedding)
Me : I'm just 19 uncle/aunty...I've my UG to finish and PG to work on.. Might take another 5-6 years easily! (Next in line?? To what?? Jumping off the cliff? No way)
The relative : That'll make you 25! half a grandma!
Me (clearly uneasy): I guess right now I dont really have any fixed plans.. Just want to finish my studies...Haven't given a thought about all this (Half-a-grandma?? WTF do you think you are you old fart?)
The relative : Good! Get married soon after UG and then go to US with your husband.. See my daughter.. She is now a happy green-card holder!
Me(very uneasy now): *smile*(Get this straight you ass.. I'm still a kid.. I know what I want and when I want it.. Green-card is not my idea of a great life.. I still don't see how you got married anyways! Must have been the greatest tragedy in your husband's/wife's life!)
Some guys can be real jerks...
Jerk: Do you know "some-arbit-girl"?
Me : I guess I know her...
Jerk: What is her character like?
Me: I don't really know her that well (and even if I did.. I dont have to tell you.. So what if she is a dirty,slimy,bitchy low-life?? You are worse!)
Jerk2: You are Y's friend right?
Me : Yeah!
Jerk2: We need to talk
Me : Ok (?????????)
Jerk2: You might think I'm mad... But I'm deeply in love with Y.. I want you to understand that!
Me : Huh?? (I know for sure that you are mad now! Why are you telling me your sob story? I dont even know you!)
Jerk2: You must talk to her about this and make her understand!
Me : *silent* (I will definitely talk to her.. tell her that you are the last person she should be seen with)Jerk2: Please sister.. Help me
Me :*silent*(If I had a brother like you.. I'd have shot him dead myself.. Buzz off!)
Other common orkut questions like "Can we have friendship?".."Shall we friends?" really draw the choicest swear out of my keyboard.. At times I think a basic English course should be undertaken by these jerks!
And this conversation took place recently... I really wish I answered the way I should have!
My parents' friend(hoping to embarass me): My daughter says you know most of the guys in college.. Is that true??
Me(smiling) : She must have been joking! (You must ask you daughter how well she knows this chap 'X'... I guess they know each other pretty well coz I see them hanging around in the canteen and the road side benches very often!!)
Saturday, May 05, 2007
The Real You
You always want to see the "real" person that your loved one is.. Its an insatiable quest.. You sometimes ask them "Who are you? I mean the real you!"... I kept asking that too... Till I read the following lyrics and till I experienced a couple of things
Well we all have a face
That we hide away forever
And we take them out and
Show ourselves
When everyone has gone
Some are satin some are steel
Some are silk and some are leather
They're the faces of the stranger
But we love to try them on
Well we all fall in love
But we disregard the danger
Though we share so many secrets
There are some we never tell
Why were you so surprised
That you never saw the stranger
Did you ever let your lover see
The stranger in yourself?
How could we show others what we never see or never admit.. even to ourselves?
If we showed them the stranger in us.. would they accept him/her?
What if they accept the stranger but we still fail to accept that part of ourself? It still breaks the relationship!
So.. I guess the only thing I want from a person I love is to be what he/she is most comfortable in being.. when he/she is with me...
I dont have the need to see the real you... coz reality is something that never exists beyond your mind!
Reality is what I believe is true.. and that really doesn't depend on you!
Well we all have a face
That we hide away forever
And we take them out and
Show ourselves
When everyone has gone
Some are satin some are steel
Some are silk and some are leather
They're the faces of the stranger
But we love to try them on
Well we all fall in love
But we disregard the danger
Though we share so many secrets
There are some we never tell
Why were you so surprised
That you never saw the stranger
Did you ever let your lover see
The stranger in yourself?
How could we show others what we never see or never admit.. even to ourselves?
If we showed them the stranger in us.. would they accept him/her?
What if they accept the stranger but we still fail to accept that part of ourself? It still breaks the relationship!
So.. I guess the only thing I want from a person I love is to be what he/she is most comfortable in being.. when he/she is with me...
I dont have the need to see the real you... coz reality is something that never exists beyond your mind!
Reality is what I believe is true.. and that really doesn't depend on you!
Tuesday, May 01, 2007
Discoveries...
I was told as a kid that when you love something or someone.. I should be proving my love every second for all my life in every way I could..
But I discovered on my own that
Indifference........
...........Increases infatuation
...........Diminishes friendship
...........Doesn't have any effect on true love!
I was told as a kid that crying was a sign of weakness....
But now I discovered that
Crying.......
.............is a sign of deep care to the one you love
.............is a harmless release for the pent up frustration and anger
.............is a plea of helplessness to the one whose attention you want
.............is the flag of truce after a fight.. it is surrendering wholly
.............is my own sweet way of saying "I miss/love/want you" when I really mean it!
I was told as a kid that dreaming was one of the greatest gifts given to a child...
But now I discovered that
Dreaming........
............is a life boat given to mankind to escape the cruelties of reality
............is the one place from where all good things originate!
More discoveries would continue in the days to come......
But I discovered on my own that
Indifference........
...........Increases infatuation
...........Diminishes friendship
...........Doesn't have any effect on true love!
I was told as a kid that crying was a sign of weakness....
But now I discovered that
Crying.......
.............is a sign of deep care to the one you love
.............is a harmless release for the pent up frustration and anger
.............is a plea of helplessness to the one whose attention you want
.............is the flag of truce after a fight.. it is surrendering wholly
.............is my own sweet way of saying "I miss/love/want you" when I really mean it!
I was told as a kid that dreaming was one of the greatest gifts given to a child...
But now I discovered that
Dreaming........
............is a life boat given to mankind to escape the cruelties of reality
............is the one place from where all good things originate!
More discoveries would continue in the days to come......
Wednesday, April 25, 2007
Funny world!
Sometimes people are funny... very funny
They wish to destroy things that have never been built
They cry coz they've lost something that never belonged to them
They complain that you've changed.. when they never knew the real person
They want to get back.. when your heart is too broken to take anyone in
They dream of happiness and lose precious opportunities to get it
They look for peace everywhere but within
They believe that when they hurt you.. it hurts very little!
They ask you to understand them but they never hear you out
But the best thing is..
They say they empathize with you.. Thats the funniest lie ever!
Funny world.. Cruelly funny world!
They wish to destroy things that have never been built
They cry coz they've lost something that never belonged to them
They complain that you've changed.. when they never knew the real person
They want to get back.. when your heart is too broken to take anyone in
They dream of happiness and lose precious opportunities to get it
They look for peace everywhere but within
They believe that when they hurt you.. it hurts very little!
They ask you to understand them but they never hear you out
But the best thing is..
They say they empathize with you.. Thats the funniest lie ever!
Funny world.. Cruelly funny world!
Sunday, April 22, 2007
God-in the smallest thing..
The result of a Sunday afternoon chat with Thatha and Dad... It started off with Dad talking about nanobots.. And as the discussion went on, Thatha was quoting something from the Vedhas... And a very interesting thought popped up in my mind... I'm just giving the actual thought train in my head.. I hope it makes sense...
When we deal with Great things, it needs greater potentiability and understanding, Superiority is graded in accordance with the subtle nature of things. A subtle thing is superior to a gross things and a subtler thing is superior to a subtle thing. These are stages and degrees of consciousness and more and more of the knowlegde flows in. That is why the sages and seers who are able to see the subtleties of objects through their intellect are known to possess Sukshma Drishti which can behold even the most subtle thing.
The Vedhas deal with two knowledgs- Lower and the Higher (Apara Vidhya and Para Vidhya). The lower knowledge deals with lesser science or secular science. This can only enable people to understand the knowledge pertaining to the universe and the objects what we see, the theory of relativity, the theory of electrons and all human theories for mean to have a sense-life.
Whereas, The Para-Vidhya or Higher Science is to understand the subtler thinsg of life, which cannot be known by the mere assemblage of words. That which cannot be seen nor seize, which has no origin, no properties, neither ears nor eyes, hands or feet, which is eternal, diversely manifested, all pervading, extremely subtle and imperishable, and can only be understood by practicing and knowing this science.
And as we see the world today, it keeps moving towards compactness and subtleness.. Gone are the days when what was making it big was actually making something big. Commercial favorites today are the smallest versions.
The hottest topics in Science & Technology include Nanotechnology, Atomic Energy and Science, Quantum theory.. More perceivable by the more knowledgeable people and a mystery to most..
Look at the potential of the smallest of the smallest 'an atom'.. The amount of energy it can generate.. Its everywhere but no-one has come up with the exact idea of what it is.. And then we have sub-atomic particles.. Smaller than an atom! What would we get if we keep searching for the smallest? Emptiness?? Or Whole?? What would you say 'zero' is?. Nothing or completion??
Why did Prahalad say " He (God) is Omnipresent, in the tiniest speck and also in the most massive structures" and what about the statement "Aham Brahmasmi!' (The Creator lies in me)... According to the most accepted theory of evolution, everything started from an atom and everything is made up of the basic unit- an atom.
And look at the Dasavatharam of Lord Vishnu in order.. It gives the various stages of evolution.. Is there some kind of link between all these? Or are these mere coincidences?
My own conclusion is the "GOD IS AN ATOM" or whatever it is that is the smallest and most basic unit of any substance. In this way I think any form of worship, beliefs, love and theories can be substantiated. This is something even an atheist cannot deny. And when it is so, even self-love is good.. Everything you do, say or perceive is due to God and is directed to the Creator! It made so much sense to me... What do you say?
Tuesday, March 06, 2007
Dreams/nightmares Tag
Tagged by my dear akka Sri... I'm gonna share some of my not-so-interesting nevertheless true dreams I've had..
I'm known to be a little psychic(yeah.. its true) so around 60% of my dreams come true.. Its very very scary at times.. esp when I've dreams like this...
I'm trapped in a room of mirrors.. The walls, ceiling and floor are all mirrors.. I dont know which one is a door.. I'm struggling to get out, pounding desperately on the walls, crying all the time and breathing keeps getting tougher.. Then the walls start closing in, and I faint/die with one last cry...
If this was scary then here comes the scarier one..
I'm sitting on my bed.. Someone knocks on the door.. I let them in.. I'm a little surprised to see that person but still I know the person too well.. That person says nothing but suddenly pulls a pillow and presses it on my face.. I struggle to escape but I'm strangely helpless and held-back by god-knows-what.. Just before I die, moon-light falls on the person's face, who is smiling very serenely and my last thoughts are "Why should you kill me..?" I've had this nightmare a couple of times.. Every time I wake up very sad rather than scared.. I see that face very clearly during the last few seconds but I forget who it is when I wake up.. Good that I don't remember!
Coming to the pleasant stuff.. I've had dreams like me winning a fashion parade(came true!) me tripping and falling down in front of a huge crowd after receiving the crown(thank god this didn't happen! most embarassing!) becoming the CEO of Taj Hotels(wish this comes true ;) ) but the best dream is something abstract and gives me maximum happiness when dreaming and a great sense of peace when I wake up..
I'm sitting near a small brook writing something in a small yellow notebook... I'm surrounded by a big meadow full of flowers.. The sky is clear and the air is mildly scented.. There is no one around for miles together.. Snow capped mountains in a distance.. I get up and walk to a small cottage(which I assume is mine).. Its really small but very pretty, covered with flowering creepers, a small vegetable garden behind and yeah.. really sweet.. I get inside and I start singing(a very nice song which I dont seem to remember once I wake up :( ) And then someone joins me in the cottage and we both keep singing(I guess its the song I wrote near the brook coz I'm holding the yellow book.. Dont remember who sings with me either!) Then I decide to come home and I step into the brook.. A wave(?!!) magically appears and carries me down the meadow, suddenly my house's staircase appears, it carries me up the stairs and gently puts me on my bed.. and then sprinkles a few drops on my face.. thats when I wake up..
Felt really good writing this tag.. Hope to come up with more sometime... People will be tagged if asked..
I'm known to be a little psychic(yeah.. its true) so around 60% of my dreams come true.. Its very very scary at times.. esp when I've dreams like this...
I'm trapped in a room of mirrors.. The walls, ceiling and floor are all mirrors.. I dont know which one is a door.. I'm struggling to get out, pounding desperately on the walls, crying all the time and breathing keeps getting tougher.. Then the walls start closing in, and I faint/die with one last cry...
If this was scary then here comes the scarier one..
I'm sitting on my bed.. Someone knocks on the door.. I let them in.. I'm a little surprised to see that person but still I know the person too well.. That person says nothing but suddenly pulls a pillow and presses it on my face.. I struggle to escape but I'm strangely helpless and held-back by god-knows-what.. Just before I die, moon-light falls on the person's face, who is smiling very serenely and my last thoughts are "Why should you kill me..?" I've had this nightmare a couple of times.. Every time I wake up very sad rather than scared.. I see that face very clearly during the last few seconds but I forget who it is when I wake up.. Good that I don't remember!
Coming to the pleasant stuff.. I've had dreams like me winning a fashion parade(came true!) me tripping and falling down in front of a huge crowd after receiving the crown(thank god this didn't happen! most embarassing!) becoming the CEO of Taj Hotels(wish this comes true ;) ) but the best dream is something abstract and gives me maximum happiness when dreaming and a great sense of peace when I wake up..
I'm sitting near a small brook writing something in a small yellow notebook... I'm surrounded by a big meadow full of flowers.. The sky is clear and the air is mildly scented.. There is no one around for miles together.. Snow capped mountains in a distance.. I get up and walk to a small cottage(which I assume is mine).. Its really small but very pretty, covered with flowering creepers, a small vegetable garden behind and yeah.. really sweet.. I get inside and I start singing(a very nice song which I dont seem to remember once I wake up :( ) And then someone joins me in the cottage and we both keep singing(I guess its the song I wrote near the brook coz I'm holding the yellow book.. Dont remember who sings with me either!) Then I decide to come home and I step into the brook.. A wave(?!!) magically appears and carries me down the meadow, suddenly my house's staircase appears, it carries me up the stairs and gently puts me on my bed.. and then sprinkles a few drops on my face.. thats when I wake up..
Felt really good writing this tag.. Hope to come up with more sometime... People will be tagged if asked..
Saturday, February 17, 2007
50 things you get to know abt me!
Tagged by Keshav.. It a rather enjoyable post to do.. but me being in a bad mood today.. This is how it turns out.. I'll tag people on request
1. Were you named after anyone?
My official name is not after anyone but the other name is that of the diety of Srirangam- Ranganayaki
2. Do you wish on stars?
Ofcourse I do!
3. When did you last cry?
This morning... The mistress of screw-ups has to cry.. right?
4. Do you like your handwriting?
Yeah.. I guess so.. It varies according to my moods.. Good or bad.. its unique.. Like me ;)
5. What is your favourite meat?
Reframe the question... I am my sister's fav meat :P
6. What is your most embarrassing CD on your shelf?
Dont have any such CDs... But might buy a copy of "dirty dancing" to answer this question :P
7. If you were another person, would YOU be friends with you?
Yeah yeah.. I certainly deserve me as a friend!(NTPK)
8.Are you a daredevil?
Shockingly, at times, yes!
9. How do you release anger?
I cry.. Thats my favorite option.. Or I take a shower..
10. Where is your second home?
I belong only in my real home.. I dont see a second home.. Sorry..
11. Do you trust others easily?
Used to.. Now I guess I'm becoming wary
12. What was your favourite toy as a child?
Mine was Mary..my doll in a wedding gown.. Thats till I was 5.. Then.. I had a new fav toy a year!
13. What class in school/college do you think is totally useless?
I think all the subjects in school were important... In coll.. everything is useless!
14. Do you use sarcasm a lot?
I do sometimes... U tell me!
15. Have you ever been in a mosh pit?
Depends on your prespective of a mosh pit.. A couple of conerts I've attended we've sorta done some moshing!
16.What do you look for in a gal(/guy)?
Quite alot.. I dont think I'll go in detail.. Decent looks, good sense of humor, smart, intelligent and yeah a big leevl of tolerance(or he cant ut up with me)
17. Would you bungee jump?
Definitely.. Its in my agenda!
18. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off?
Never.. Always gets on my mom's nerves!
19.what's your favourite ice cream?
Vanilla. Butter scotch. Chocolate... In the order
20. What are your favourite colours?
Black, yellow, peach
21. What are your least favourite things?
Big list.. sorry
22. How many people do you have a crush on right now?
he he he... Why didn't I face this question before? a time I might have given interesting answers.. As of now.. No one :(
23. Who do you miss most right now?
The spark that was in me.. which is now all gone!
24. What are you listening to right now?
The fan, TV from downstairs and my own lil conscience asking me to do something constructive
25. If you were a crayon, what colour would you be?
Black or yellow
26. What is the weather like right now?
Pleasant... It might rain..
27. Last person you talked to on the phone?
The person who tagged me
28. The "first" thing you notice about the opposite sex?
Eyes... or smile...
29. Do you like the person who sent you this?
I suppose I should :P
30. How are you today?
Miserable... Screwed up a performance... And I feel like I'm the biggest jackass on earth..
31. Favourite non alcoholic drink?
Butter milk, sweet lime juice and vanilla milk shake.. In the order
32. Favourite alcoholic drink?
Benadryl rocks! Gin comes to a close second ;)
33. Natural hair colour?
Brown
34. Eye colour?
Brown
35. Wear contacts?
No..
36. Siblings?
One angel in disguise.. My lil sis! Love u baby!
37. Favourite month?
July... The month of birthdays!
38.Favourite food?
Anything tastes good when I'm hungry.. But I love paruppu samadham(dhal rice) with french fries any day! vathal kozhambu is a bonus!
39. Favourite day of the year?
July 6th... I'm a so self centred!
40. Have you ever been too shy to ask someone out?
I've not met anyone that dashing.. but if I do... I might be a lil shy.. Not for too long!
41. Scary movies or happy endings?
Happy Endings.. I'm a sucker for happy endings
42. Summer or winter?
Love and hate both equally
43. Holi or Diwali?
Diwali.. The best time of the year
44. Do you like your name?
Yes! Smart and cool.. so unlike me though
45. What book/magazine are you reading?
Rule of four by Dustin Thomasan and someone else... Awesome!
46. What's on your mouse pad?
The Registry- Omaha
47. What did you watch on TV last night?
Charlie and the Chocolate factory.. wasnt very happy with that movie
48. Favourite Smell?
Baby lotion/soap, jasmine
49. Have you ever regretted breaking up with someone?
Broke up with a couple of friends.. very painful... but never regretted it... Am regretting not breaking with a friend now..
50. Most tiresome thing you’ve ever experienced/done?
Attended class after a 1 hour sleep and that too with high fever.. Horrible!
1. Were you named after anyone?
My official name is not after anyone but the other name is that of the diety of Srirangam- Ranganayaki
2. Do you wish on stars?
Ofcourse I do!
3. When did you last cry?
This morning... The mistress of screw-ups has to cry.. right?
4. Do you like your handwriting?
Yeah.. I guess so.. It varies according to my moods.. Good or bad.. its unique.. Like me ;)
5. What is your favourite meat?
Reframe the question... I am my sister's fav meat :P
6. What is your most embarrassing CD on your shelf?
Dont have any such CDs... But might buy a copy of "dirty dancing" to answer this question :P
7. If you were another person, would YOU be friends with you?
Yeah yeah.. I certainly deserve me as a friend!(NTPK)
8.Are you a daredevil?
Shockingly, at times, yes!
9. How do you release anger?
I cry.. Thats my favorite option.. Or I take a shower..
10. Where is your second home?
I belong only in my real home.. I dont see a second home.. Sorry..
11. Do you trust others easily?
Used to.. Now I guess I'm becoming wary
12. What was your favourite toy as a child?
Mine was Mary..my doll in a wedding gown.. Thats till I was 5.. Then.. I had a new fav toy a year!
13. What class in school/college do you think is totally useless?
I think all the subjects in school were important... In coll.. everything is useless!
14. Do you use sarcasm a lot?
I do sometimes... U tell me!
15. Have you ever been in a mosh pit?
Depends on your prespective of a mosh pit.. A couple of conerts I've attended we've sorta done some moshing!
16.What do you look for in a gal(/guy)?
Quite alot.. I dont think I'll go in detail.. Decent looks, good sense of humor, smart, intelligent and yeah a big leevl of tolerance(or he cant ut up with me)
17. Would you bungee jump?
Definitely.. Its in my agenda!
18. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off?
Never.. Always gets on my mom's nerves!
19.what's your favourite ice cream?
Vanilla. Butter scotch. Chocolate... In the order
20. What are your favourite colours?
Black, yellow, peach
21. What are your least favourite things?
Big list.. sorry
22. How many people do you have a crush on right now?
he he he... Why didn't I face this question before? a time I might have given interesting answers.. As of now.. No one :(
23. Who do you miss most right now?
The spark that was in me.. which is now all gone!
24. What are you listening to right now?
The fan, TV from downstairs and my own lil conscience asking me to do something constructive
25. If you were a crayon, what colour would you be?
Black or yellow
26. What is the weather like right now?
Pleasant... It might rain..
27. Last person you talked to on the phone?
The person who tagged me
28. The "first" thing you notice about the opposite sex?
Eyes... or smile...
29. Do you like the person who sent you this?
I suppose I should :P
30. How are you today?
Miserable... Screwed up a performance... And I feel like I'm the biggest jackass on earth..
31. Favourite non alcoholic drink?
Butter milk, sweet lime juice and vanilla milk shake.. In the order
32. Favourite alcoholic drink?
Benadryl rocks! Gin comes to a close second ;)
33. Natural hair colour?
Brown
34. Eye colour?
Brown
35. Wear contacts?
No..
36. Siblings?
One angel in disguise.. My lil sis! Love u baby!
37. Favourite month?
July... The month of birthdays!
38.Favourite food?
Anything tastes good when I'm hungry.. But I love paruppu samadham(dhal rice) with french fries any day! vathal kozhambu is a bonus!
39. Favourite day of the year?
July 6th... I'm a so self centred!
40. Have you ever been too shy to ask someone out?
I've not met anyone that dashing.. but if I do... I might be a lil shy.. Not for too long!
41. Scary movies or happy endings?
Happy Endings.. I'm a sucker for happy endings
42. Summer or winter?
Love and hate both equally
43. Holi or Diwali?
Diwali.. The best time of the year
44. Do you like your name?
Yes! Smart and cool.. so unlike me though
45. What book/magazine are you reading?
Rule of four by Dustin Thomasan and someone else... Awesome!
46. What's on your mouse pad?
The Registry- Omaha
47. What did you watch on TV last night?
Charlie and the Chocolate factory.. wasnt very happy with that movie
48. Favourite Smell?
Baby lotion/soap, jasmine
49. Have you ever regretted breaking up with someone?
Broke up with a couple of friends.. very painful... but never regretted it... Am regretting not breaking with a friend now..
50. Most tiresome thing you’ve ever experienced/done?
Attended class after a 1 hour sleep and that too with high fever.. Horrible!
Wednesday, February 14, 2007
A short story on Valentine's day...
Guys.. Gimme a good title for this one and ofcourse your reviews!
It was almost 5 pm, a very beautiful evening in a lovely park. Scent of flowers, pleasant breeze and probably an ideal ambience for the couples there, who were 'planning' for Val's day, which was just a week away. Shankar was an exception. He was waiting nervously near the entrance, looking into his watch frequently, and despite the cool breeze, sweating. Priya, his girlfriend for the past 3 years, had called him that morning, from a public booth (or so he guessed) and in a troubled tone, had asked him to wait near the entrance of the park at 5 pm and had cut the phone abruptly.
Priya walked in exactly at 5pm. Shankar, relief surging through him, rushed out to greet her. But she motioned him to be silent, looked around, caught him arm and literally dragged him as quick as she could to their favorite bench. This bench was where they had met often during the 3 years and it held many special memories. But on that day, Priya broke down weeping! "My parents know!” she wailed,” I don’t think I can come out of the house again un-noticed". A painful silence prevailed. "They've fixed my engagement with Tilak tomorrow.. Even now, I had to sneak out of the house when everyone was busy with the preparations.. I can’t stay here too long.. I must leave now.. I really don’t know what to do..I feel like dying Shankar... ". Shankar put his arm around her and hung his head, searching for the right words. "Shall we get married now? I mean right now!". Priya looked up, looked right into his eyes and said, "I cant come against my parents' wishes.. You know that.. That’s why I waited all this time.. I just cant Shankar!" and starts sobbing again. With only her sobs breaking the silence, time froze for a few minutes. Shankar then said, with all the determination he could muster "Lets part now! I know it’s hard on both of us but it'll be harder if you stay longer.. Go and marry Tilak, Priya! We may have failed as lovers, but at least lets satisfy our parents and make them happy.. Go on.. Don’t look back!". Priya got up reluctantly, gave him one last look and hurried home. Shankar sighed heavily and closed his eyes.
A week later...
It was Valentine's Day and Trojan Cafe; the hot spot for the town's couples was brimming with people. Seated beside his new girlfriend Sheela, Shankar hardly looked the grief-stricken, heart-broken lover. Priya walked in with her fiancé Tilak. Her eyes met Shankar's and then was a brief sad smile in both their lips. Shankar's smile broadened as soon as her back turned. It became smug! "It worked perfectly", he thought.” I’d been planning this for a month and the time came only a week before when Priya's mom picked the phone. Though I knew it was her mom, I continued talking as if I thought it was Priya, coz I know she'd be caught and we'd have to split up. Priya became boring of-late and after I met Sheela, my feelings for her died. And to think, we talked about marriage some two weeks back! Phew!" and he puts his arm lovingly on a beaming Sheela.
The focus is now on Priya who is rather happily chatting with her fiancé. She seems to be a perfectly normal radiant bride-to-be. Inside she is thinking "Not bad.. It really worked! How could have I ever fallen in love with Shankar? Such a pathetic loser! It struck me only when he talked about marriage that I've gotten myself into a trap. And the only way to escape unscathed is to 'get caught' at home so that they'd get me married to Tilak soon giving Shankar no chance to stop my wedding... And the only way to get caught was to put my mobile where it can catch mom's eyes and stay off the place for some time... It really worked!".. She smiled sweetly at Tilak who was discussing the Visa procedure with her..
It was almost 5 pm, a very beautiful evening in a lovely park. Scent of flowers, pleasant breeze and probably an ideal ambience for the couples there, who were 'planning' for Val's day, which was just a week away. Shankar was an exception. He was waiting nervously near the entrance, looking into his watch frequently, and despite the cool breeze, sweating. Priya, his girlfriend for the past 3 years, had called him that morning, from a public booth (or so he guessed) and in a troubled tone, had asked him to wait near the entrance of the park at 5 pm and had cut the phone abruptly.
Priya walked in exactly at 5pm. Shankar, relief surging through him, rushed out to greet her. But she motioned him to be silent, looked around, caught him arm and literally dragged him as quick as she could to their favorite bench. This bench was where they had met often during the 3 years and it held many special memories. But on that day, Priya broke down weeping! "My parents know!” she wailed,” I don’t think I can come out of the house again un-noticed". A painful silence prevailed. "They've fixed my engagement with Tilak tomorrow.. Even now, I had to sneak out of the house when everyone was busy with the preparations.. I can’t stay here too long.. I must leave now.. I really don’t know what to do..I feel like dying Shankar... ". Shankar put his arm around her and hung his head, searching for the right words. "Shall we get married now? I mean right now!". Priya looked up, looked right into his eyes and said, "I cant come against my parents' wishes.. You know that.. That’s why I waited all this time.. I just cant Shankar!" and starts sobbing again. With only her sobs breaking the silence, time froze for a few minutes. Shankar then said, with all the determination he could muster "Lets part now! I know it’s hard on both of us but it'll be harder if you stay longer.. Go and marry Tilak, Priya! We may have failed as lovers, but at least lets satisfy our parents and make them happy.. Go on.. Don’t look back!". Priya got up reluctantly, gave him one last look and hurried home. Shankar sighed heavily and closed his eyes.
A week later...
It was Valentine's Day and Trojan Cafe; the hot spot for the town's couples was brimming with people. Seated beside his new girlfriend Sheela, Shankar hardly looked the grief-stricken, heart-broken lover. Priya walked in with her fiancé Tilak. Her eyes met Shankar's and then was a brief sad smile in both their lips. Shankar's smile broadened as soon as her back turned. It became smug! "It worked perfectly", he thought.” I’d been planning this for a month and the time came only a week before when Priya's mom picked the phone. Though I knew it was her mom, I continued talking as if I thought it was Priya, coz I know she'd be caught and we'd have to split up. Priya became boring of-late and after I met Sheela, my feelings for her died. And to think, we talked about marriage some two weeks back! Phew!" and he puts his arm lovingly on a beaming Sheela.
The focus is now on Priya who is rather happily chatting with her fiancé. She seems to be a perfectly normal radiant bride-to-be. Inside she is thinking "Not bad.. It really worked! How could have I ever fallen in love with Shankar? Such a pathetic loser! It struck me only when he talked about marriage that I've gotten myself into a trap. And the only way to escape unscathed is to 'get caught' at home so that they'd get me married to Tilak soon giving Shankar no chance to stop my wedding... And the only way to get caught was to put my mobile where it can catch mom's eyes and stay off the place for some time... It really worked!".. She smiled sweetly at Tilak who was discussing the Visa procedure with her..
Sunday, January 28, 2007
Bend it like Mom!
Before I start this post.. I just wanna shout out to the world "MOM ROCKS!!! ABSOLUTELY!!!"..
I got up at around 8a.m today, which is a little too early to be out of bed of a Sunday morning, especially when I was feeling slightly feverish and I had an irritating dry cough which didn't allow me to have a really peaceful weekend crash. Some might mistake this 'early rise' as a step towards preparation for my cycle tests from Monday but hey, you guys know me better!
I had the alarm set for 6 am initially. The reason is that Mom has gone to attend her cousin's wedding in Bangalore and our servant was sacked a week back. So she wanted me to do some chores, like sweeping the house, mopping it if possible and to wash the clothes(washing machine is there ofcourse). I decided that this wouldn't take more than an hour so I decided to start the day with some things she said I needn't bother myself with. Watering the garden!
Been too long since I had a communion with Nature. The garden was too tempting. The weather was perfect and I set out to water the plants. Our garden is not very big but there are plenty of pots and a small lawn, which took more time than I had expected, to be watered. I had almost finished watering them all, humming arbit tunes. The last few plants were outside the compound wall, and I impatiently tugged at the water hose, hoping to get over with it soon. That was my first mistake. The water flow stopped. I turned off the pipe and check all the connections and when I turned it on again, surprise! a forceful jet of water rushed as the hose broke off the pipe and I got totally drenched! I might have enjoyed getting wet had it been another place and at another time, but with so much of work ahead, I got really pissed. I spent some fifteen minutes clearing up the mess(yeah, there was water everywhere and I didn't want anyone, mainly me, slipping in the marble pavement)
I decided to start the original work plan. I collected clothes from all the rooms, seperated the ones that could be washed in the machine and hand-washed the remaining few. I had loaded the machine and I confidently turned it on. It actually worked pretty smoothly for some time. When I came back to check on it, after helping my cook was the vessels, I found the machine making weird noises and worse still, not working! Spent another quarter hour trying to fix it, at the end of which, thankfully.. it worked!
Sweeping the house came next. I hated sweeping even as a kid when we were supposed to sweep our classes in school. Pushing benches, emptying the dust bin, picking up papers, I'd do them all but sweeping was a big turn off. My house(for the benefit of those who haven't come home) has three halls in the ground floor with a kitchen and a bed room and one hall and four rooms in the upper floor. Since dad was having his breakfast downstairs, I started sweeping upstairs. I don't remember the last time I sweated that badly. I was soaked and I had to change before I came downstairs. My hands started to ache and I was feeling exhausted. I remember Dad saying something about the 'second wind' and today, was one of the rare days, I experienced it. By the time I had finished one hall, I was feeling ok enough to finish the rest! Mopping followed.
Mopping was fun usually, but today, my patience had worn as thin. Mom would generally empty the pail of water used and refill with clean water for every room and I was doing it only after finishing two rooms. I was swinging the mop so wildly that I knocked off the pail of dirty water! and that too, just when I had finished the entire hall. What ensued is pretty easy to guess. I had to mop the hall all over again. And to add on to my woes, I slipped in front of my room and almost sprained an ankle (thank God it didn't get sprained).
Cleaning the bathrooms was the last item in the morning chores. I was way too tired and the time was already 12:30 so I finished it as fast as I could (translated as, as shabby as I could) and had a long shower.
I really can't help but admire mom, as she has done all this without complaining for the past one week. She starts working at 5 am, finishes all the chores by 10 am and then leaves for the hospital! A couple of days of this schedule and I'm sure I'd have all my extra pounds dissolving. I learnt so many things, the dignity of any labor, the meaning behind some of our old customs, the difficulties of a professional woman, the value of mom and yeah, remembering to check the hose-pipe joint before you turn on the pipe!
I got up at around 8a.m today, which is a little too early to be out of bed of a Sunday morning, especially when I was feeling slightly feverish and I had an irritating dry cough which didn't allow me to have a really peaceful weekend crash. Some might mistake this 'early rise' as a step towards preparation for my cycle tests from Monday but hey, you guys know me better!
I had the alarm set for 6 am initially. The reason is that Mom has gone to attend her cousin's wedding in Bangalore and our servant was sacked a week back. So she wanted me to do some chores, like sweeping the house, mopping it if possible and to wash the clothes(washing machine is there ofcourse). I decided that this wouldn't take more than an hour so I decided to start the day with some things she said I needn't bother myself with. Watering the garden!
Been too long since I had a communion with Nature. The garden was too tempting. The weather was perfect and I set out to water the plants. Our garden is not very big but there are plenty of pots and a small lawn, which took more time than I had expected, to be watered. I had almost finished watering them all, humming arbit tunes. The last few plants were outside the compound wall, and I impatiently tugged at the water hose, hoping to get over with it soon. That was my first mistake. The water flow stopped. I turned off the pipe and check all the connections and when I turned it on again, surprise! a forceful jet of water rushed as the hose broke off the pipe and I got totally drenched! I might have enjoyed getting wet had it been another place and at another time, but with so much of work ahead, I got really pissed. I spent some fifteen minutes clearing up the mess(yeah, there was water everywhere and I didn't want anyone, mainly me, slipping in the marble pavement)
I decided to start the original work plan. I collected clothes from all the rooms, seperated the ones that could be washed in the machine and hand-washed the remaining few. I had loaded the machine and I confidently turned it on. It actually worked pretty smoothly for some time. When I came back to check on it, after helping my cook was the vessels, I found the machine making weird noises and worse still, not working! Spent another quarter hour trying to fix it, at the end of which, thankfully.. it worked!
Sweeping the house came next. I hated sweeping even as a kid when we were supposed to sweep our classes in school. Pushing benches, emptying the dust bin, picking up papers, I'd do them all but sweeping was a big turn off. My house(for the benefit of those who haven't come home) has three halls in the ground floor with a kitchen and a bed room and one hall and four rooms in the upper floor. Since dad was having his breakfast downstairs, I started sweeping upstairs. I don't remember the last time I sweated that badly. I was soaked and I had to change before I came downstairs. My hands started to ache and I was feeling exhausted. I remember Dad saying something about the 'second wind' and today, was one of the rare days, I experienced it. By the time I had finished one hall, I was feeling ok enough to finish the rest! Mopping followed.
Mopping was fun usually, but today, my patience had worn as thin. Mom would generally empty the pail of water used and refill with clean water for every room and I was doing it only after finishing two rooms. I was swinging the mop so wildly that I knocked off the pail of dirty water! and that too, just when I had finished the entire hall. What ensued is pretty easy to guess. I had to mop the hall all over again. And to add on to my woes, I slipped in front of my room and almost sprained an ankle (thank God it didn't get sprained).
Cleaning the bathrooms was the last item in the morning chores. I was way too tired and the time was already 12:30 so I finished it as fast as I could (translated as, as shabby as I could) and had a long shower.
I really can't help but admire mom, as she has done all this without complaining for the past one week. She starts working at 5 am, finishes all the chores by 10 am and then leaves for the hospital! A couple of days of this schedule and I'm sure I'd have all my extra pounds dissolving. I learnt so many things, the dignity of any labor, the meaning behind some of our old customs, the difficulties of a professional woman, the value of mom and yeah, remembering to check the hose-pipe joint before you turn on the pipe!
Monday, January 15, 2007
I shall ramble on!
I've been surprisingly busy for the past one week. Was working on a paper and some working model for a contest. I found myself liking the 'work' which I had never wanted to do when I started my engineering course. I wanted to maintain a non-techie image, not that its changed, but I guess I like a little bit of techincal stuff. Atleast it keeps me happy that I'm doing something constructive(NTPK!)
I've been reading many blogs these days. Thanks to TIFAC. Lazy afternoons, with a slightly long lunch break and a boring hour after that, usually drive me nuts. So I allow myself to be dragged to the net lab by my classmate and since it would be too embarassing if someone caught me snoozing, I read blogs.
I usually get lost in whatever I read and these blogs were no exception. Sketches of people I've never seen or will ever see kept forming in my mind as I went through their blogs. The variety, the different outlooks, styles of expressing thoughts, humour, satire and tears, the differences made each blog worth reading. And reading all those blogs made me feel small yet content. Small coz I know I'm just an atom in the blogging universe and content to be a part of the infinity. My blog, which I feel is boring, kiddish and at times downright stupid, is still a part of me. So I decided not to give up blogging(sorry, I know its tragic but still...) It certainly doesnt matter who is reading this or who is not, I shall continue to ramble!
I've been reading many blogs these days. Thanks to TIFAC. Lazy afternoons, with a slightly long lunch break and a boring hour after that, usually drive me nuts. So I allow myself to be dragged to the net lab by my classmate and since it would be too embarassing if someone caught me snoozing, I read blogs.
I usually get lost in whatever I read and these blogs were no exception. Sketches of people I've never seen or will ever see kept forming in my mind as I went through their blogs. The variety, the different outlooks, styles of expressing thoughts, humour, satire and tears, the differences made each blog worth reading. And reading all those blogs made me feel small yet content. Small coz I know I'm just an atom in the blogging universe and content to be a part of the infinity. My blog, which I feel is boring, kiddish and at times downright stupid, is still a part of me. So I decided not to give up blogging(sorry, I know its tragic but still...) It certainly doesnt matter who is reading this or who is not, I shall continue to ramble!
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